"The Not Now Trap." You bet I recognize this. Laundry is a great example -- I was swamped in more laundry then necessary for a couple of years because I didn't want to make the effort to teach my older two kids to do their own. Actually, to be more precise, I didn't want to have to deal with the shrunken-laundry type of mistake that they might make while learning.
Turned out it wasn't a problem. I taught them, they learned, and now I have 1/3 less laundry to do, and they have grown another little step toward taking responsibility for caring for themselves and others.
"Hard-hitting intellectual rigor" starts exactly with what you are discussing here. So many (or most) of my insights are born in the reflection on mundane everyday occurrences, interactions, or tasks; each of them contains a deep nugget of truth that you can unpack, exactly as you did here. The Mandarin part a definite surprise :) We used to live in a town surrounded by Mandarin speakers and actually attended a Mandarin-speaking church for a couple of years to support our American friends in their outreach efforts. If you can wrap your head around those tones, any other language is a piece of cake! We speak thee different languages in our home and my most frequent exclamation is : "Schwiizerduetsch!" - reminding them to speak Swiss German and not English to each other. My teens are very grateful that I was so insistent because they are now fluent in a language that would otherwise have been hard to acquire.
Thanks for sharing your insights - they are spot on!
Truly a pleasure to get some time with you and looking forward to getting the chance to do it again! I'm thankful we have this platform to stay connected until then.
Absolutely LOVE this ... I was a 'way too busy' Dad, separated from my kids, still estranged sadly from my daughter who is a Mum herself. Thank goodness I'm a proud Grandpa to Olivia and Fin and finding as many 'let's do this together' moments as we can squeeze into their lives. Great writing, thank you
Ah, thank you so much. I find myself doing the same thing with my mom and dad too: I've realized that I ignored many of their practical and moral lesson as a child and hope to learn them now as an adult. It sounds like, adversities being what they are, you're making the most of where you're at: plod onward!
I’m a way better grandpa than I was a dad. Good to have this opportunity. Occasionally my own lad surprises me with things he remembers from childhood that he picked up from me.
There's no better time than "now" to give things a try. I'll probably write about my adventures into opening up and figuring out the inside of my laptop when I find time to transfer the pictures over.
I went a little overboard doing it but considering I use this thing every day I'll consider it an investment. :)
Oct 24, 2023·edited Oct 24, 2023Liked by Nate Marshall
Indeed, my friend. I thoroughly enjoyed it. And had a great time at the pub on Saturday night, hanging with the farmers (of course). Look forward to your assessment.
Your writing is just beautiful, Nathaniel, but this particular entry is full of so many quotes that I want to frame a put on my wall! Several of which have already been cited in the comments. Thank you for sharing. There are many things I wish my parents took the time to teach me as a child that I hope I still get to learn as we all age.
You’re so kind, Olivia. I’m fortunate to have my parents still, so I’m trying to glean the lessons and skills I was too immature to receive when I was younger. I hope you have good growth from here on out!
Thanks for sharing this! I have to say that I loved the phrasing of "What starts with a button can be watered with practice to become a patch, placed in the sun to become a seam, and later reap a harvest of homemade garments." This speaks to so much in life, all those simple things that we don't even think about but share with others. There is a purpose, a hope that it will grow and blossom. Definitely going up in my sewing room... it's lovely.
"Don’t let a 'later' arrive that is pregnant only with the twins of grief and regret. Do everything in your power to make sure you can welcome into your present a 'later' that will give birth to that for which your heart most deeply longs and has been intentionally prepared to receive: the Good."
Convicting and inspiring. I've know I've told my oldest (now three-years-old) "not now" too many times. But you're absolutely right Nathaniel that there is so much joy to be had "now" if we're willing to slow down and share.
Glad to have you back around. Excited to hear your recap of the FPR conference.
This is wonderful. We are never too old to learn, and there's something about learning that keeps us young, I think! God bless her as she learns and you as you teach.
"The Not Now Trap." You bet I recognize this. Laundry is a great example -- I was swamped in more laundry then necessary for a couple of years because I didn't want to make the effort to teach my older two kids to do their own. Actually, to be more precise, I didn't want to have to deal with the shrunken-laundry type of mistake that they might make while learning.
Turned out it wasn't a problem. I taught them, they learned, and now I have 1/3 less laundry to do, and they have grown another little step toward taking responsibility for caring for themselves and others.
Great piece, Nathaniel!
Why are we like this? 🥲
Thank you, Dixie!
"Hard-hitting intellectual rigor" starts exactly with what you are discussing here. So many (or most) of my insights are born in the reflection on mundane everyday occurrences, interactions, or tasks; each of them contains a deep nugget of truth that you can unpack, exactly as you did here. The Mandarin part a definite surprise :) We used to live in a town surrounded by Mandarin speakers and actually attended a Mandarin-speaking church for a couple of years to support our American friends in their outreach efforts. If you can wrap your head around those tones, any other language is a piece of cake! We speak thee different languages in our home and my most frequent exclamation is : "Schwiizerduetsch!" - reminding them to speak Swiss German and not English to each other. My teens are very grateful that I was so insistent because they are now fluent in a language that would otherwise have been hard to acquire.
Thanks for sharing your insights - they are spot on!
Nate,
Sorry I missed you at the conference. I certainly would have liked to have at least said hello.
Brian Miller
https://www.wingedelmfarm.com/blog/
Oh man, were you there? Did we pass like two ships in the Machine-induced night?
Poignant, beautiful, and needful.
Speaking of which, totally awesome to meet and talk at the FPR conference -- what a joy!
Thank you, Graham.
Truly a pleasure to get some time with you and looking forward to getting the chance to do it again! I'm thankful we have this platform to stay connected until then.
Absolutely LOVE this ... I was a 'way too busy' Dad, separated from my kids, still estranged sadly from my daughter who is a Mum herself. Thank goodness I'm a proud Grandpa to Olivia and Fin and finding as many 'let's do this together' moments as we can squeeze into their lives. Great writing, thank you
Ah, thank you so much. I find myself doing the same thing with my mom and dad too: I've realized that I ignored many of their practical and moral lesson as a child and hope to learn them now as an adult. It sounds like, adversities being what they are, you're making the most of where you're at: plod onward!
I’m a way better grandpa than I was a dad. Good to have this opportunity. Occasionally my own lad surprises me with things he remembers from childhood that he picked up from me.
祝你的奴孩子有力的学习！
There's no better time than "now" to give things a try. I'll probably write about my adventures into opening up and figuring out the inside of my laptop when I find time to transfer the pictures over.
I went a little overboard doing it but considering I use this thing every day I'll consider it an investment. :)
Indeed, my friend. I thoroughly enjoyed it. And had a great time at the pub on Saturday night, hanging with the farmers (of course). Look forward to your assessment.
Cheers,
Brian
Your writing is just beautiful, Nathaniel, but this particular entry is full of so many quotes that I want to frame a put on my wall! Several of which have already been cited in the comments. Thank you for sharing. There are many things I wish my parents took the time to teach me as a child that I hope I still get to learn as we all age.
You’re so kind, Olivia. I’m fortunate to have my parents still, so I’m trying to glean the lessons and skills I was too immature to receive when I was younger. I hope you have good growth from here on out!
Thanks for sharing this! I have to say that I loved the phrasing of "What starts with a button can be watered with practice to become a patch, placed in the sun to become a seam, and later reap a harvest of homemade garments." This speaks to so much in life, all those simple things that we don't even think about but share with others. There is a purpose, a hope that it will grow and blossom. Definitely going up in my sewing room... it's lovely.
I’m so glad to have said something that resonated with you! Go sew (and sow 😉) something beautiful!
"Don’t let a 'later' arrive that is pregnant only with the twins of grief and regret. Do everything in your power to make sure you can welcome into your present a 'later' that will give birth to that for which your heart most deeply longs and has been intentionally prepared to receive: the Good."
Convicting and inspiring. I've know I've told my oldest (now three-years-old) "not now" too many times. But you're absolutely right Nathaniel that there is so much joy to be had "now" if we're willing to slow down and share.
Glad to have you back around. Excited to hear your recap of the FPR conference.
I'm glad that hit you. That was my intention. May only "laters" pregnant with Good arrive at your temporal door!
This is wonderful.
And not only the children- teach anyone!
At our local Prayer Shawl Ministry, we are teaching the 80-ish organist
from one of the Lutheran churches to knit. I kept assuring her that it
was nothing but muscle memory- eventually it would be like playing
the piano for her.
She has finished her second shawl and we have moved her "up" to
smaller needles and yarn. (Maybe too small a needle- she is slightly discouraged
at the slower progress, but we can up the size a bit.)
She continues to improve every week.
This is wonderful. We are never too old to learn, and there's something about learning that keeps us young, I think! God bless her as she learns and you as you teach.
Ah, Mt. Garment. I know thee well.
🥲 I have scaled your heights and fallen. Thou hast wrecked me, and I am wrecked.
😂
This resonated loudly with me. And I love his delivery!